birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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