i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize