Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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