Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
