i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
