we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
