Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
