Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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