Whoa Z and x make the same sound
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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