Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
They are going to name an STD after you.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize