She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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