I bet he comes in French.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We left the knife in your bed.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Randomize