Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
