Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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