Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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