What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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