he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
