what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
