Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
