Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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