His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
