so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
