Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We left an ass print on the piano.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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