I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
