shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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