In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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