Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
