He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
should my penis look like a turkey
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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