When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I'm both gender and math confused
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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