1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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