Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
