so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
