Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
