Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
