My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
