you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You ruined the universe
Randomize
