i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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