You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
