Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
