He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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