god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
