i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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