Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize