There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
