I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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