I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
