her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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