Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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