on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
