He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Randomize
