She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
