I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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